Geez. I've only read 27% of the books on the American Library Association's 100 Most Frequently Challenged Books 1990-2000, and most of them I read in grade school. Guess I've got a lot of catching up to do to become a real troublemaker.
The idiotic thing is that most of the children's books on the list are banned for the most inane reasons, like a visible nipple in the Where's Waldo books (but good luck finding it) or something titled "Scary Stories" actually having *shock and horror!* scary stories in it.
1. Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz
The hook, the hitch-hicker's sweater, the babysitter...they're all here...waiting to corrupt fourth-graders...bwahaha....
2. Daddy’s Roommate by Michael Willhoite
3. I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
You know what's seditious? Maya Angelou now writes cards for Hallmark.
4. The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
5. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
6. Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
7. Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling
8. Forever by Judy Blume
9. Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
This is a heartbreaking, thoughtful story about the platonic friendship between a boy and a girl. God forbid children ever get to learn to interact with the opposite sex as equals. Better ban it.
10. Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
11. Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman
12. My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
13. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
14. The Giver by Lois Lowry
15. It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
16. Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine
Beelzebub reads them to the lil' demons before tucking 'em in. Nuff said.
17. A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck
18. The Color Purple by Alice Walker
19. Sex by Madonna
20. Earth’s Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel
21. The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson
The last thing we'd want to do is write a positive story about a little girl in foster care, 'cause that might give kids the idea that they can get all uppity.
22. A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle
No! Not a Christian novel about theoretical physics!!! You're upsetting typical religion vs. science dichotomies!!! Would somebody please think of the children!!!
23. Go Ask Alice by Anonymous
24. Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers
25. In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
26. The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard
27. The Witches by Roald Dahl
This is just dumb. It's a "How to Spot Witches" guide, for pete's sake: no toes, blue spit, claws, bald. You'd think this would be helpful for the "Burn them! No, DROWN them! No, BURN them!" chorus, but nooooo-oooooooo.
28. The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein
You can do it in the bum. Ssssssssssssshhhhhhh. Don't tell anyone. We don't think they'll figure it out without the manual.
29. Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry
What was the most offensive part, I wonder - the fact that Anastasia talks to her goldfish, or that her father is a professor at Harvard?
30. The Goats by Brock Cole
31. Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane
32. Blubber by Judy Blume
33. Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan
34. Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam
35. We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier
36. Final Exit by Derek Humphry
37. The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood
Quick, pull them off the shelves! The president doesn't want to be accused of plagiarism!
38. Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George
39. The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
40. What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras
Don't need this one. The "You're a defective, inferior, stinky mass of human flesh unworthy of love" pamphlets have much nicer pictures, don't you think?
41. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
I think this is on here 'cause it be a big ol' lie. They don't kill no mockin' burds in dis here book. Nossir, not e'en ONE.
42. Beloved by Toni Morrison
43. The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton
44. The Pigman by Paul Zindel
45. Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard
46. Deenie by Judy Blume
Because good girls don't masturbate. Even in metaphor.
47. Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes
48. Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden
49. The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar
50. Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz
51. A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein
Fair enough. If you put a brassiere on a camel and then write a poem about it, you know what to expect.
52. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
53. Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)
54. Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole
55. Cujo by Stephen King
Rabid dogs, even imaginary ones, eat babies. That's why.
56. James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
Giant peaches also eat babies.
57. The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell
This used to be shelved in the anarchy section at the World's Biggest Bookstore in Toronto. Seriously.
58. Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
59. Ordinary People by Judith Guest
60. American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
61. What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras
62. Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume
God does not want to know about your period, you perverted little girl. Now go burn your copy of #40 right now, and read this pamphlet.
63. Crazy Lady by Jane Conly
64. Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher
65. Fade by Robert Cormier
66. Guess What? by Mem Fox
67. The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende
68. The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney
69. Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
Boobs. Oh, and we firebombed Dresden during WWII, and there were American POWs there. Ssshh. Don't tell.
70. Lord of the Flies by William Golding
No women are abused or belittled in this book. That will simply not do.
71. Native Son by Richard Wright
72. Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women’s Fantasies by Nancy Friday
Don't be ridiculous. Women don't like sex. Stop giving them ideas.
73. Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen
74. Jack by A.M. Homes
75. Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya
76. Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle
77. Carrie by Stephen King
Too much menstrual blood.
78. Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume
79. On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer
80. Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge
81. Family Secrets by Norma Klein
82. Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole
83. The Dead Zone by Stephen King
Mr. King, we've warned you before about taunting the CIA.
84. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
85. Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
86. Always Running by Luis Rodriguez
87. Private Parts by Howard Stern
88. Where’s Waldo? by Martin Hanford
Boobs, again.
89. Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene
Sympathetic Nazi forces rethinking of simplistic concept of evil.
90. Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman
91. Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
92. Running Loose by Chris Crutcher
93. Sex Education by Jenny Davis
94. The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene
95. Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
96. How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell
Promotes vegetarianism.
97. View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts
98. The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder
99. The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney
100. Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
More banned books (with links to purchase) at Forbidden Library.
Poor Anastasia! Actually, poor kids who will never know Anastasia because their parents and teachers are reactionary nitwits.
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