Now, as a woman, I'm naturally more inclined towards news coverage of interpersonal relationships than any of that icky stuff known as "politics." It makes my brain hurt too much, you see, when the pundits do their talking heads thing, and my sensitive girly bits can't handle all the rampant aggression that starts to flow when they start yelling at each other about that economy-thingie. It makes me nervous. I just flip to the Arts and Life section as quickly as I possibly can, desperately trying to get away from anything that says "Gomery."
That's why I'm so pleased about the way the newspapers are reporting Belinda Stronach's defection to the Liberal Party. You see, I'm just thrilled that the front page story of the day is how "jilted" deputy Tory leader Peter MacKay's feeling about his treacherous former girlfriend. Look at how sad he is on the cover of the Globe:
See? MacKay's so sad that he had to flee home to Nova Scotia back to the warm embrace of his family and dog. Can you read the secondary headline? Apparently the lovelorn MacKay "pleaded with his lover into the wee hours" not to leave the party. Stronach's choice "ripped out his heart", because the "handsome, ruddy-cheeked 39-year-old" known as "the Hill Times's reigning sexiest MP" was "completely surprized." "I knew she'd been troubled," MacKay told reporters, "...but I didn't see this coming. I didn't see it coming."
Poor, poor dear. What a bitch that Belinda Stronach was, defying the wishes of her "lover" so cruelly. How could she allow her ambition and sense of personal responsibility to the country take precidence over what is obviously a more crucial role she had as a woman? She was the deputy leader of the opposition's helpmate - how could she have given that role up so casually? A source quoted in today's Globe even reveals that MacKay was considering making an honest woman out of her: "the MPs had discussed the possibility of marriage." Marriage! That foundation of all goodness in the world, that fundamentally perfect union that Conservatives consider so holy it is worth defeating the Charter of Rights and Freedoms for! And Belinda rejected it!
Clearly, Belinda Stronach is a traitor to more than her former party - she is a traitor to the proper role of women everywhere.
Isn't that right, Bob Runciman?
"She sort of defined herself as something of a dipstick, an attractive one, but still a dipstick, with what she's done here today. She is, at the end of the day, going to paint herself as something of a joke.”
What do you think, Stephen Harper?
Aw, hell. Find your own Harper links. That bastard gets more airtime to spout off about women's failings than George W.
More to come. I'm nowhere near done with this.
Irkesome, though we know the make of the suit she wore, the quality of the perfume floating around her neck, the height of those 4 inch heels and who designed them... the sources seem to be reluctant to reflect specifics where her male counterparts are concerned... I quote:
"The handsome, ruddy-cheeked 39-year-old wore an off-white work shirt layered over a dark T-shirt, his khaki pants tucked into orange rubber boots."
Was the work shirt Tommy Hilfigger? Did Fruit of the Loom loom the T-shirt? Were those khakis Tilley Endurables? And those classy rubber boots, my god, who made those? Could it possibly be Eddie Bauer? Or perhaps they were haute couture and made personally just for him? Please oh please, consumers need to know!
It's unconscionable! How dare they treat McKay so badly... not even mentioning one designer name... poor thing, he was veritably fashion stripped; he must be from the Maritimes.
Posted by: lmno | May 20, 2005 at 12:15
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