Philoillogica

Monday miscellany

Did you know...

...that the National Post is now helpfully offering a weekly column to detail the astonishing ways that men and women are different?  Check out this shining beacon of infomatic wisdom that in no way implies that the sex responsible for the bulk of domestic activity is inferior:

While vacuuming, men usually push the vacuum cleaner back and forth in straight sweeps, but women usually push the vacuum clearer in a more erratic path.

...that George Clooney's penis does a remarkable Groucho Marx impression...

...that the new planet discovered at the farthest reaches of our solar system has been nicknamed "Xena" after the best ass-kicking heroine of all time...

...that its moon is named "Gabrielle"...

...that, after a 10-year delay, Australian senators are finally moving to get RU 486, 'the abortion pill', approved...

...that the Rolling Stones, authors of "Cocksucker Blues," saw their halftime performance at the Superbowl edited to remove a reference to a "male chicken," but not their explicit allusion to oral sex...

...BMW's been given a "Google Death Penalty" for trying to screw with the search provider's data collection...?

Well, now you do.

Monday Miscellany

It's been awhile, but I need the push, SO:

Did you know...

...that Russian authorities are fearing riots over a possible vodka shortage, after enacting a law on January 1 that effectively halted production...

...that Chile has just elected its first female president...

...that the planet Pluto was named by an 11-year-old girl...

...that Shakespearean boat-rocker Gary Taylor wants everybody to know that he did NOT invent the word "Nixonism", no matter what the OED says...

...that "Mommy Brain" is now proven to be a solidly inane and scientifically ungrounded excuse for patriarchy...

...that David Hasselhoff is back on the market...

...that Maryland has just enacted legislation forcing Wal-Mart (and other employers of more than 10,000 people) to pay employee healthcare benefits to the tune of 8% of payroll or pay into state-provided Medicaid...

...that Dr. Bronner's soap-label wisdom is now widely available through the magic of the Internets...

Well, now you do.

Monday Miscellany

Did you know...

...that US veterans are OUTRAGED at that Wedding Crashers movie, because Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson pretend to have Purple Hearts in order to attract women? Apparently veterans find the idea offensive because it detracts from their ability to woo hot young poon-tang: "Somebody else wearing a medal and they didn't earn it — that's defrauding people who've earned it," said George Sakato, 84, who received the medal for his acts of bravery during the Second World War. I guess there's just not enough for veterans to be outraged against lately, not like there's a war on or anything...

...that cats can't taste sweet things...

...that in an effort to combat eating disorders, Israel is passing a law to make models adhere to a minimum BMI:

This Sunday, a committee of the Israeli parliament, the Knesset, will decide whether to proceed with a bill to compel model agencies to monitor the health and body mass index (the ratio of height to weight) of models. Models would have to undergo regular medical tests to ensure their body mass index (BMI) is 19 or above. The most serious anorexics can have a BMI as low as seven.

If the Knesset passes the bill, Barkan hopes the effect will be two-fold. First, agencies will be forced to confront a problem they have for long ignored and, second, only "healthy" models will be seen on television, in magazines and on billboards...

...that my crush on Bruce Campbell is still alive and thriving...

..that artistic tradition still insists that a woman's pregnant body is more interesting as a symbol of conspiracy than as a natural process of creation...

...that Stonehenge has never been comprehensively studied by archaeologists...

...that a prehistoric stone phallus has just been unearthed in Germany.  Appropriately enough, it is extremely well-polished...

...that an Indian yoga teacher is hoping to get in the record books by swallowing fish and blowing them out of his nose...

...that apparently if you're not smart enough, Americans won't kill you...

Well, now you do.

Monday Miscellany

Did you know...

...that spam helps you lose weight...

...that Estonians are the world's best wife-carriers...

...that Justin Timberlake threw up all over the floor of his own LA restaurant...

...that holly bushes are slowly trying to take over the world...

...that Oxford Press has produced a children's dictionary citing (for the first time) children's books...

Well, now you do.

Monday Miscellany

Did you know...

...that Paul Winchell, the voice of Tigger, not only died yesterday, but that he was also an inventor with a patent for a prototype artificial heart he built in the 1960s, as well as the creator of an"invisible" garter belt, a flameless cigarette lighter and an early version of the disposable razor...

...that Hitler's royalties for Mein Kampf are still flowing in, but the state of Bavaria, who owns the rights, refuses payment...

...that a "7.6-metre-tall, 16-tonne treat of frozen Snapple unexpectedly quickly melted in the midday sun Tuesday, flooding Union Square in downtown Manhattan with pink fluid that sent pedestrians scurrying for higher ground"...

...that a third of Canadians who've read The Da Vinci Code believe it to be true (sigh)...

...that Michael "Lord of the Dance" Flatley will soon be starting a world tour that makes "Riverdance look like a bicycle compared to the Concorde"...

...that Tom Cruise is still an idiot...

...that "A 13-year-old girl has become the youngest author to be published in South Africa's main medical journal for her research on 'PlayStation thumb' "...

Well, now you do.

Monday Miscellany

Did you know...

...that a first edition of Anne of Green Gables formerly owned by Rambo: First Blood director George Cosmatos has recently sold to an unknown bidder for $24,000 US...

...that oil patch workers in Alberta are responsible for an increase in urine sales, and that one can apparently purchase "synthetic" urine for less than $50 CDN...

...that a British company has invented a hot-air balloon that flies upside down...

...that a bar of soap made out of the liposuctioned fat of Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi has just sold for $18,000...

...that Suddam Hussein can eat a large bag of Doritos in only 10 minutes...

...that there's a kangaroo on the loose in Charleston, West Virginia...

...that British potato farmers had a protest last week to remove the term "couch potato" from the Oxford English Dictionary, because it "harms the vegetable's image"...

???

Well, now you do.